hey wen r u goin 2 pick me up ???
from a 707 phone number, Thursday, March 25, 10:39 PM

hey da dance ends at 5 oclock k ill kall u after
from a 707 phone number, Friday, March 26, 6:26 PM

I can't tell if giving their children cell phones has made parents' lives easier or harder.

Leilaoliviadadmom
from an 856 phone number, Thursday, March 25, 2:25 PM

Presumably a list of everyone in a nuclear family?

April first casting crowns are you coming
from a 937 phone number, Monday, March 22, 7:19 PM

Easter party at my house sat 3 at noon let me know if u can come
from a 707 phone number, Tuesday, March 23, 11:10 PM

Pick up stix w tamara is fri april 1st at camelback store at 330
from a 480 phone number, Thursday, March 25, 9:53 PM

Ugh I have to turn down so many fun invitations this week! Because I don’t know where they are!

We have texting now
from a 716 phone number, Tuesday, March 23, 7:01 PM

I got a cellphone i have to go to bed ill text 2morrow
from a 716 phone number, Tuesday, March 23, 9:29 PM

So now that 716 has texting, should I be expecting a lot more messages like these? Is 716 going to be the new Cheryl?

hey baby my ipod died
Go Dawgs!!!
from a 678 phone number, Sunday, March 21, 8:02 PM

Things we know about 678:
1. Leila is his “baby.”
2. He and Leila are in the sort of codependent confessional relationship where he feels compelled to text her every time something not very important happens to him.
3. He is a fan of the “Dawgs,” which is probably a sports team of some variety.

Hi.what r u doing?
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Sunday, March 21, 6:04 PM

Ok
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Sunday, March 21, 7:07 PM

Cheryl never quits, does she?

Ok… Well you if you don’t want to talk anymore that’s fine. I guess i’ll just talk to you tomorrow.
from a 603 phone number, Sunday, March 21, 12:32 PM

Oh, please. Don’t be so defensive. It’s not that Leila doesn’t “want to talk anymore.” It’s just that she’s not receiving your messages. Get a grip.

Can max give me a ride home?
from a 603 phone number, Saturday, March 20, 11:42 AM

Are you at your dads?
from a 603 phone number, Saturday, March 20, 12:09 PM

What do we think is 603's relationship to Leila? They do not share the same father, so they're not full sisters (though I guess they could be half-sisters). Yet Leila has some sort of authority over who can give 603 a ride home. Thoughts?

Every1s txting
STUPID
from a 440 phone number, Friday, March 19, 3:47 PM

Hey
BAMF28
from a 440 phone number, Saturday, March 20, 11:20 AM

No clue what these all-caps phrases mean. I guess "STUPID" means that something is stupid (like, everyone texting?). BAMF28 could also mean stupid. Like in a foreign language. A language that integrates numerals into its words.

Hey. Wow school is boring
from a 206 phone number, Friday, March 19, 1:11 PM

And as a result, your text message is, too.

HAPPY BIRTHAY!! Love u more than life...my baby girl!! xoxo..Mom
from an 860 phone number, Friday, March 19, 12:29 PM

Yes, I told Leila's mom that her daughter hadn't received this text. I'm lazy and sometimes mean, but not so lazy and mean that I'd deny a Leila her mother's birthday wishes!

Jareds 6th birthday will be at chuck e cheese on saturday april 3 at 12 oclock til 130 hope to see u and Gaby
from a 904 phone number, Thursday, March 18, 6:03 PM

Chuck-E-Cheese?!? Don't worry, I wouldn't miss it for the world. Love me that ball pit.

Heyy
I <3 Allison
from a 440 phone number, Thursday, March 18, 3:50 PM

I also heart Allison! Presumably a different Allison, though. I heart my best friend, Allison Smith, whose photos, by the way, you can see at the bottom of this page. It's true, just scroll down. My Allison is a very talented artist. What's YOUR Allison, 440?

gonna be late Tyree forgot his bag had to turn around. Should only be about 5 min late. Sorry. You can tell her if you want. Its ok.
from a 706 phone number, Thursday, March 18, 7:57 AM

Nice job, Tyree. Way to screw it up for everyone.

P.S. This is what half the text messages I sent to my friends look like (minus the reference to Tyree, since I don't know any Tyrees). I am habitually late and habitually apologetic.

Loll!
*Logan lover*
from a 203 phone number, Wednesday, March 17, 2:02 PM

I assume this girl means that she loves Logan Bruno, Mary Anne's boyfriend in The Babysitters Club. I can't think what else she could be referring to. Also, this especially makes sense since 203 is a Connecticut area code, and Logan lived in Stoneybrook, Connecticut. Q.E.D.

I am at Colleen,s playing srabble. will be home tomorrow. Love u...mom
from a 425 phone number, Tuesday, March 16, 11:46 PM

No, you're not, Leila's mom. You are clearly on a date and sleeping over, and you don't want your daughter to know. Colleen's house is just your cover. Because I know playing Scrabble is fun and all (not joking-- I love Scrabble), but it is by no means an all-night party, esp. not on a Tuesday.

hey were r u were at our house nd ur not der
from a 707 phone number, Tuesday, March 16, 7:39 PM

To translate, for those of you who don't do this multiple times a day:

"Hey, where are you? We're at out house, and you're not there."

So that's one question answered. Where is Leila? Still a mystery.

Hi leila!
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Monday, March 15, 7:41 PM

Hi leila
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Tuesday, March 16, 5:26 PM

Y r u not answering my txts
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Tuesday, March 16, 8:00 PM

Leila r u there?
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Wednesday, March 17, 7:19 PM

Wat r u doing
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Wednesday, March 17, 7:21 PM

Y aren,t u answeriog my texts messages
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Wednesday, March 17, 8:22 PM

What school do u go to??
~Cheryl~
from a 928 phone number, Friday, March 19, 7:33 PM

This last text puts all the dozens of other ones in perspective. Cheryl is actually Leila's stalker. She texts her multiple times a day, asking "r u there" and "wat r u doing," not because they are best friends-- how could they be, when Cheryl doesn't even know what school Leila goes to? No, they are not best friends. But Cheryl WANTS to be best friends with Leila... she really, really wants it...

were the hell are you jj
-abby-
from a 951 phone number, Monday, March 15, 6:27 PM

sorry your here
-abby-
from a 951 phone number, Monday, March 15, 6:28 PM

yourgoingtogetslaped
-abby-
from a 951 phone number, Monday, March 15, 9:44 PM

Why is Leila going to get slapped, Abby? You found her--exactly where she was supposed to be!-- so slapping her now seems arbitrary and punitive.