Howd ur finals go?
from a 734 phone number, Tuesday, January 22, 12:24 PM
Ugh, I have always felt bad for students who have their final exams AFTER winter break. It seems like, how can you enjoy vacation when you know you ought to b studying? I don't know that many schools that are scheduled like that, though. Just Harvard. I wonder if the intended Leila is at Harvard. If she is, then I would imagine she's sort of smart, which makes me wonder why her 734 friend is dumb enough that she doesn't know how to send a text message without messing up. Maybe 734 isn't actually friends with Leila (because she, 734, is too dumb) but just wants to "get in good" with her. Or maybe Leila is not at Harvard, after all. Lots of variables here.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Please call this number very important info. 16319607178 Keep it real
from a 704 phone number, Monday, January 21, 2:54 PM
I did not call this number because it looked suspiciously like spam, like if it were an email it would say "Please click on this link" and you would find yourself on a pay-per-minute porn site. But if you want to call this number to find out what's actually on the other hand, please, be my guest. Report back!
from a 704 phone number, Monday, January 21, 2:54 PM
I did not call this number because it looked suspiciously like spam, like if it were an email it would say "Please click on this link" and you would find yourself on a pay-per-minute porn site. But if you want to call this number to find out what's actually on the other hand, please, be my guest. Report back!
FWD: FWD: FWD: FWD: FWD: Fwd: FWD: Fwd:-- Forward this to ten of your friends and then look at
from a 503 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:59 PM
your wallpaper. don't get mad this is funny=)
from a 503 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 10:59 PM
You know you have too many "FWD"s in there if they cause you to go over your maximum character allotment and sprawl into two texts. You could have saved precious cents had you bothered to erase even just one or two of those opening "FWD"s. Just saying, 503 girl.
from a 503 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:59 PM
your wallpaper. don't get mad this is funny=)
from a 503 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 10:59 PM
You know you have too many "FWD"s in there if they cause you to go over your maximum character allotment and sprawl into two texts. You could have saved precious cents had you bothered to erase even just one or two of those opening "FWD"s. Just saying, 503 girl.
leila whats wrong. can u call me back
from amn 808 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:46 PM
CALL ME11111111111
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:57 PM
I was in the middle of something when I got these texts, but, what can I say, I'm a sucker for long series of 1's (used on place of exclamation points). Plus, whenever a Leila Texter asks what's wrong, I feel compelled to text back to reassure them that nothing is wrong at all. On this particular evening, that made me the girl who said to her friends, "Be right back-- I need to go find some cell reception so I can text this stranger back." My friends nodded resignedly. It all makes me feel bizarrely heroic.
from amn 808 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:46 PM
CALL ME11111111111
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 20, 10:57 PM
I was in the middle of something when I got these texts, but, what can I say, I'm a sucker for long series of 1's (used on place of exclamation points). Plus, whenever a Leila Texter asks what's wrong, I feel compelled to text back to reassure them that nothing is wrong at all. On this particular evening, that made me the girl who said to her friends, "Be right back-- I need to go find some cell reception so I can text this stranger back." My friends nodded resignedly. It all makes me feel bizarrely heroic.
nice musuc...i know were you live...ha ha ha
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 4:32 AM
why are you mad
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:32 AM
are you mad at me...seriously iam tierd of fighting
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:34 AM
arnt you going to bed
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:34 AM
its haley can you please stop being mean i m jusr trying to go to bed
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:50 AM
Really, Haley? You're just trying to go to bed? Really? Because, you know what, me too. Or-- no, wait-- I'm trying to stay asleep, actually, because it's FIVE-THIRTY IN THE FUCKING MORNING, but I'm finding that pretty difficult, Haley, because you KEEP TEXTING ME ALL THE TIME.
I know, I know, you'll say: Leila, if you don't want to get texts all through the night, turn off your phone; unfortunately, on this particular night I was expecting a text message from a friend to wake me up-- at around 10 AM, by the way, not 5 AM-- so my phone remained on. And therefore I received this veritable plethora of texts from Haley.
503 is in Oregon, so I guess she sent her first text message when it was only 1:32 AM, Oregon time, which is totally fine. I mean, I often send texts at 1:32 AM. But if Leila is not texting you back, dear, maybe you should assume she has gone to bed? Not that she's mad at you. Just that she is sleeping.
Eventually, I could not stand it any longer. I called Haley (yes, at 5:50 AM my time) and gave her the whole shpeil about how she needs to pull up Leila's number from her contacts list and yada yada. So I guess it's true: I've now explained the Leila texts so many times that I can LITERALLY do it in my sleep.
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 4:32 AM
why are you mad
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:32 AM
are you mad at me...seriously iam tierd of fighting
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:34 AM
arnt you going to bed
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:34 AM
its haley can you please stop being mean i m jusr trying to go to bed
from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 19, 5:50 AM
Really, Haley? You're just trying to go to bed? Really? Because, you know what, me too. Or-- no, wait-- I'm trying to stay asleep, actually, because it's FIVE-THIRTY IN THE FUCKING MORNING, but I'm finding that pretty difficult, Haley, because you KEEP TEXTING ME ALL THE TIME.
I know, I know, you'll say: Leila, if you don't want to get texts all through the night, turn off your phone; unfortunately, on this particular night I was expecting a text message from a friend to wake me up-- at around 10 AM, by the way, not 5 AM-- so my phone remained on. And therefore I received this veritable plethora of texts from Haley.
503 is in Oregon, so I guess she sent her first text message when it was only 1:32 AM, Oregon time, which is totally fine. I mean, I often send texts at 1:32 AM. But if Leila is not texting you back, dear, maybe you should assume she has gone to bed? Not that she's mad at you. Just that she is sleeping.
Eventually, I could not stand it any longer. I called Haley (yes, at 5:50 AM my time) and gave her the whole shpeil about how she needs to pull up Leila's number from her contacts list and yada yada. So I guess it's true: I've now explained the Leila texts so many times that I can LITERALLY do it in my sleep.
Just woke up due 2 not sleeping last nit bidari?!
from a 917 phone number, Friday, January 18, 12:37 AM
917 is for New York cell phones, so presumably this person is in the EST zone. And he woke up at 12:37 AM? I don't understand the timing of it at all. He must have taken a nap. I often take afternoon naps. Though generally, when I nap, I try to wake up before 12:37 AM. Even in NYC, where nights get going late, waking up at 12:37 AM is not a great way to start a night of partying.
from a 917 phone number, Friday, January 18, 12:37 AM
917 is for New York cell phones, so presumably this person is in the EST zone. And he woke up at 12:37 AM? I don't understand the timing of it at all. He must have taken a nap. I often take afternoon naps. Though generally, when I nap, I try to wake up before 12:37 AM. Even in NYC, where nights get going late, waking up at 12:37 AM is not a great way to start a night of partying.
Any 1 there?
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:33 PM
Please answer!!!!! its anna !its been Me the whole time
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:45 PM
What u doing
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:55 PM
It never ceases to amaze me the desperation that teenage girls exhibit when they don't get an immediate response to a sent text message. Maybe Leila didn't text you back because she was BUSY. Did you consider that, hmm, Anna? Maybe she was on the phone with someone else. Maybe she didn't even get your goddamn text messages because you didn't even bother to pull her name up out of your contacts list.
"Please answer" followed by five exclamation points is the text message of a girl whose parents are dying or who is trapped in a burning building. Anna, if that's not what's happening to you, then you are a little too "boy who cried wolf" for me. Chill out.
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:33 PM
Please answer!!!!! its anna !its been Me the whole time
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:45 PM
What u doing
from a 914 phone number, Thursday, January 17, 5:55 PM
It never ceases to amaze me the desperation that teenage girls exhibit when they don't get an immediate response to a sent text message. Maybe Leila didn't text you back because she was BUSY. Did you consider that, hmm, Anna? Maybe she was on the phone with someone else. Maybe she didn't even get your goddamn text messages because you didn't even bother to pull her name up out of your contacts list.
"Please answer" followed by five exclamation points is the text message of a girl whose parents are dying or who is trapped in a burning building. Anna, if that's not what's happening to you, then you are a little too "boy who cried wolf" for me. Chill out.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
what r u doing today and when ru xoming home
from an 808 phone number, Monday, January 7, 5:41 PM
where did u go today
from an 808 phone number, Monday, January 7, 10:57 PM
wow. thanks lei. very nice . luv u
from an 808 phone number, Saturday, January 12, 8:13 PM
did u send to mom
from an 808 phone number, Saturday, January 12, 8:14 PM
i can't pick u up, ihave th
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 12:05 AM
i,m sick with fever and cough
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 12:06 AM
lei b sure to dbl check all your bags to see u didnt forget anything. wallet laptop and your Ds. and clothes
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 7:05 PM
First of all: If Leila didn't respond to your first five text messages, then why on earth did you continue to text her? Obviously, that line of communication is not working.
Furthermore, how micro-managing does 808 seem to be? Asking at 5:41 PM, "what r u doing today," followed by, a mere five hours later, "where did u go today." If Leila didn't tell you beforehand, why would she tell you afterward? And then the bit about double-checking her bags to make sure she remembered clothes?
Option one is that Leila is severely developmentally disabled. Option two is that 808 is controlling and overbearing, in which case "lei" is lucky that she didn't have to receive all of these text messages.
from an 808 phone number, Monday, January 7, 5:41 PM
where did u go today
from an 808 phone number, Monday, January 7, 10:57 PM
wow. thanks lei. very nice . luv u
from an 808 phone number, Saturday, January 12, 8:13 PM
did u send to mom
from an 808 phone number, Saturday, January 12, 8:14 PM
i can't pick u up, ihave th
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 12:05 AM
i,m sick with fever and cough
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 12:06 AM
lei b sure to dbl check all your bags to see u didnt forget anything. wallet laptop and your Ds. and clothes
from an 808 phone number, Sunday, January 13, 7:05 PM
First of all: If Leila didn't respond to your first five text messages, then why on earth did you continue to text her? Obviously, that line of communication is not working.
Furthermore, how micro-managing does 808 seem to be? Asking at 5:41 PM, "what r u doing today," followed by, a mere five hours later, "where did u go today." If Leila didn't tell you beforehand, why would she tell you afterward? And then the bit about double-checking her bags to make sure she remembered clothes?
Option one is that Leila is severely developmentally disabled. Option two is that 808 is controlling and overbearing, in which case "lei" is lucky that she didn't have to receive all of these text messages.
Monday, January 14, 2008
FWD: Be At Peace.... Andrew Dezio. pass it on for his familyy, friends and loved ones..
from a 585 phone number, Tuesday, January 8, 3:35 PM
Once again, google is our best friend. For a full news story, go here. As a summary if that link should become inactive: Andrew Dezio was a 15-year-old boy whose body was found near a country club on January 8. Interestingly, the way that the cops found him involved tracing the last active signal from his cell phone. (This is interesting if you care at all about the varied uses for cell phones, which I assume you do, since you read this blog.)
This cell phone number is from northwest New York (says my list of area codes), which is also where Andrew Dezio lived (says that news article). And given, too, that the police found Andrew's body at 8:40 AM on the day this text was sent, I would venture that this 585 guy was at least tangentially connected to Andrew. And so s/he sent a text message about it.
It's so funny, the ways people handle grief and loss. It's like, if someone I knew died, I would probably post a myspace bulletin to alert as many of my friends as possible. But that's sort of... disquieting, isn't it?
from a 585 phone number, Tuesday, January 8, 3:35 PM
Once again, google is our best friend. For a full news story, go here. As a summary if that link should become inactive: Andrew Dezio was a 15-year-old boy whose body was found near a country club on January 8. Interestingly, the way that the cops found him involved tracing the last active signal from his cell phone. (This is interesting if you care at all about the varied uses for cell phones, which I assume you do, since you read this blog.)
This cell phone number is from northwest New York (says my list of area codes), which is also where Andrew Dezio lived (says that news article). And given, too, that the police found Andrew's body at 8:40 AM on the day this text was sent, I would venture that this 585 guy was at least tangentially connected to Andrew. And so s/he sent a text message about it.
It's so funny, the ways people handle grief and loss. It's like, if someone I knew died, I would probably post a myspace bulletin to alert as many of my friends as possible. But that's sort of... disquieting, isn't it?
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Saturday, January 5, 2008
To seneca make a right on 206 at the diner...and your first left on carranza
from a 609 phone number, Saturday, January 5, 9:34 AM
This text offers further proof that this 609 lady is not in high school:
1. High schoolers are shit at giving directions; or, at least, I was, when I was in high school. I was always like, "Just drive until you come to that place, then go right... well, not really right, but sort of veer right?... and then you'll see it on the left. Or maybe on the right. It's either the first or second green house." Using street names and highway numbers is behavior peculiar to adults.
2. High schoolers do not send text messages at 9:34 AM on a Saturday.
Case closed.
OH BUT WAIT-- I just googled "seneca" and "carranza." Turns out Seneca HIGH SCHOOL is on Carranza Rd. in Tabernacle, NJ. So is 609 a high school student, after all? Or is she the parent of a high school student?
Lesson of the day: The case is never closed. Not when it comes to the Leila Texts.
from a 609 phone number, Saturday, January 5, 9:34 AM
This text offers further proof that this 609 lady is not in high school:
1. High schoolers are shit at giving directions; or, at least, I was, when I was in high school. I was always like, "Just drive until you come to that place, then go right... well, not really right, but sort of veer right?... and then you'll see it on the left. Or maybe on the right. It's either the first or second green house." Using street names and highway numbers is behavior peculiar to adults.
2. High schoolers do not send text messages at 9:34 AM on a Saturday.
Case closed.
OH BUT WAIT-- I just googled "seneca" and "carranza." Turns out Seneca HIGH SCHOOL is on Carranza Rd. in Tabernacle, NJ. So is 609 a high school student, after all? Or is she the parent of a high school student?
Lesson of the day: The case is never closed. Not when it comes to the Leila Texts.
Sorry I've taken such a long hiatus from this blog. I went away on vacation for a while, and then I had to get my phone replaced (for reasons unconnected to text messages), but now I'm back! So let's kick off the new year with a bang:
Amy johnson is now a vet at new bolton who will be specializing in neurology. Spoke to her today
from a 609 phone number, Thursday, January 3, 2:36 PM
Aside from the obvious explanation, which is that this message is code for something (like where "vet" = drug dealer and "neurology" = crystal meth), let's imagine why 609 is passing along such detailed information for Leila. Maybe Amy Johnson went to Leila's high school, but they've fallen out of touch in the years since, so 609 has tracked Amy down for Leila. You can tell 609 and Leila, unlike so many of the Leila Texters, are not still in high school because they use words like "specializing" and "neurology" in their text messages, as opposed to words like "hot" and "bitch."
Amy johnson is now a vet at new bolton who will be specializing in neurology. Spoke to her today
from a 609 phone number, Thursday, January 3, 2:36 PM
Aside from the obvious explanation, which is that this message is code for something (like where "vet" = drug dealer and "neurology" = crystal meth), let's imagine why 609 is passing along such detailed information for Leila. Maybe Amy Johnson went to Leila's high school, but they've fallen out of touch in the years since, so 609 has tracked Amy down for Leila. You can tell 609 and Leila, unlike so many of the Leila Texters, are not still in high school because they use words like "specializing" and "neurology" in their text messages, as opposed to words like "hot" and "bitch."
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