Ken nos larry t. no u r in mting. am home now. out 2 lunch. home at 2.
from an 847 phone number, Saturday, January 15, 11:45 AM EST

The only interesting part of this text is that Ken knows Larry T., and that's not even that interesting, since I don't know Larry T.

Will u go out with bryce
from an 814 phone number, Tuesday, January 11, 7:38 PM EST

Yes. I will go out with Bryce. Because obviously, if he was willing to go through the effort of asking 814 to ask me, he must really love me. This is a sign that Bryce and I would have a very successful and rewarding relationship.

I'll be in rochester in 37 days!!!
from a 315 phone number, Tuesday, January 11, 2:51 PM EST

Are we talking Rochester, New York, here? This is the longest countdown I have ever seen to a Rochester, New York trip.

Leila you have the best phoe i evr sen
from a 515 phone number, Tuesday, January 11, 1:53 PM EST

515 is transitioning into full sentences. Slowly, I might add.

I am like flipping out right now
from a 508 phone number, Sunday, January 9, 12:25 AM EST

omg, I know, I like also am as well.

do you play settlers of catan? silidia and I are playing tonight ad could use a 4th
from a 269 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 9:09 PM EST

I do not play Settlers of Catan, but I am aware of its existence, mostly thanks to how there was once a Scav Hunt item about it. It's funny how only certain games have this turn of phrase, "Do you play..." as opposed to "Can you play..." I would never ask someone, "Do you play Crazy Eights?" Because that is not part of people's identities.

If this is leila diggy had a sheser
from a 541 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 7:39 PM EST

I googled "sheser." It appears to be a person's name, but not an actual "thing." So what it means for Diggy to have one remains a mystery. I hope it's a positive thing, anyway.

U r right i need to find someone that wants what i want i just need to find a way to stop feeling the way i do about him
from a 732 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 6:16 PM EST

732 just summed up roughly 90% of romantic relationships. This is such a universal statement. Poetry in text message.

this is jessica and we r having the family bday party on Mon. the 10th mom is cooking dinner and grama is making the cake
from a 205 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 2:01 PM EST

But whose birthday is it, actually? You can't have a bday party for an entire family... unless all members were born within a few days of one another... which would be, like, eerie.

We have a chance to purchase Elton John Tickets tonight before they go on sale tomorrow for MACC members. Does anyone want to join us? Tickets r 150 per
from an 808b phone number, Friday, January 7, 9:34 PM EST

Really, Elton John? Didn't you hear there's a recession going on?

barackman I have 2 go my battery is running out
from a 917 phone number, Friday, January 7, 6:14 PM EST

barAckman It says this is my spooky sleepover story but there is one interruption lol
from a 917 phone number, Friday, January 7, 6:26 PM EST

barackman The book im reading is really creepy and sad
from a 917 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 4:50 PM EST

barackman Omg leila if u think i need a doctor then that proves u need one
from a 917 phone number, Saturday, January 8, 7:34 PM EST

We now know roughly every thought this girl has had over the past two weeks. Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Lk my nw signature??
*im nt an option i hv options*
from a 414 phone number, Thursday, January 6, 11:07 PM EST

Sure, I like your new signature. Self-esteem is legit.

ey well c ya at that party night? kim house
from a 713 phone number, Wednesday, January 5, 4:54 PM EST

y u aint here! crazyness goin on. if u coming pick up lighter fluid on th way. just ran out
from a 713 phone number, Wednesday, January 5, 11:32 PM EST

Lela dont come cops just showd up were leavin kim leaved 2 wear r u?
from a 713 phone number, Thursday, January 6, 1:12 AM EST

This is an absolutely amazing progression of the highs and lows of Kim's party. I am blown away.

there is a teching of revelations tonight at 7 On the 3rd day, Easter! HE rose.
from a 218 phone number, Tuesday, January 4, 4:20 PM EST

Why are we talking about Easter right now? It's January. I know we're all ready for it to be spring so we can wear our spring frocks and Easter hats once again, but seriously, it is JANUARY.

On my birthday first we are going to wait till everybody that i invited to come.then we are going to a place where there are lot's of fun games.
from a 505 phone number, Monday, January 3, 6:45 PM EST

For some reason I read this text message as super-creepy. Like it sounds like something a child in a horror movie would say.

We r coming
from a 404 phone number, Monday, January 3, 12:09 PM EST

Hey srry we havent left....just be redy
from a 404 phone number, Monday, January 3, 12:33 PM EST

Ok acctually on our way....
from 404 phone number, Monday, January 3, 12:37 PM EST

This is so similar to what it's like when I try to meet anyone that it's embarrassing. I swear, guys, 2011: I want to be on time to things this year. I really do.

Hey mama just a reminder dvds lol we are working together tomorrow and when is ur party so i can request off
from a 732 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 9:07 PM EST

Hello just checkin on u u sounded really bad this morning txt me if u need anything
from a 732 phone number, Monday, January 3, 10:53 AM EST

I've said this before, but I find it a little odd when people have their mothers listed in their phones by their first names (in this case, "Leila"). My mama is in my phone as "Mama." That way, if I ever lose my phone, the person who finds it will know whom to call to return it to me. How would the person who found 732's phone know to call Leila?

Did you tell lauren cause well...shes te txting me saying stuff and i just want to know that you already toldh her
from a 248 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 4:09 PM EST

Told Lauren what, exactly? Told Lauren that you HOOKED UP WITH HER EX-BOYFRIEND? (Or something else?)

U r sssooo awesome?!
from a 415 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 2:10 PM EST

Delete that question mark, and yes, I am.

barackman Whats the news u have for me?
from a 917 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 8:47 AM EST

barackman Roger eila buttcrack!are u home and ready 2 text
from a 917 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 3:34 PM EST

barackman Come on can u text?
from a 917 phone number, Sunday, January 2, 4:21 PM EST

barackman Hey doing homework u can still text though
from a 917 phone number, Wednesday, January 5, 6:01 PM EST

Thankfully, the Barackman-917 interactions never end. Their friendship is the gift that keeps giving.