Hey Miss, I have down on my calendar Chelsea Handler for this Friday night with Val & friends..Do u know if this still is happening?
from a 602 phone number, Monday, May 9, 6:53 PM EST

According to Wikipedia, Chelsea Handler "is an American stand-up comedian, humorist, television host, actress, model, and best-selling author." Not to be jealous, but IS THERE NOTHING THIS BITCH CAN'T DO?