You still have my slushie straw right?
from a 503 phone number, Thursday, May 26, 11:42 AM EST

Call me a fool, but: do slushies require special straws?

Hi love, we went to civil war battlefields ayer. today we spent the day in williamsburg,and tomorrow i n yorktown alls well, love, mom
from a 209 phone number, Wednesday, May 25, 8:46 PM EST

This is such an exciting text for me to receive because this is what my new novel, PAST PERFECT, is about! I set PAST PERFECT around Williamsburg/Yorktown area, because that is one of the only places in the country where you can go to Civil War battlefields as well as Colonial living history museums. And now a Leila Texter has actually gone there! It is like my book come to life!

Tammy seems so sad and down what is going on w her
from a 405 phone number, Wednesday, May 25, 5:24 PM EST

She failed her math final, duh. Wouldn't you be sad and down, too?

leila < 3 jack
justin bieber is AWESOME!!!!!!!!
from a 408 phone number, Wednesday, May 25, 12:53 PM EST

If you didn't know, at this point I wouldn't blame you for wondering if the Leila Texts are, in fact, sponsored by Justine Bieber's estate.

Ewwww i saw a guy in a speedo with flower pink sandals
from a 504 phone number, Tuesday, May 24, 3:56 PM EST

I guess it depends on the guy. I guess on some people this could look... good?

Will u ask around...I need ideas for graduation gifts: Catherine, Claire G, Jill Tbac.
from a 610 phone number, Thursday, May 26, 1:52 PM EST

i m not understanding this. Y r u doing it? is this E choice to keep us from meddling? i nevr heard of restaurant. r Cohens coming? i cant txt any more.
from a 610 phone number, Thursday, May 26, 1:57 PM EST

I promise that these two texts came from the same phone number, what the hell happened between 1:52 and 1:57?

If you could have tasted the roast that I made last Saturday, you would have been on the next plane to Providence. It tasted like prime rib. The best.
from a 774 phone number, Thursday, May 26, 3:20 PM EST

The au jus (home made - not can) ..... you would have drank....
from a 774 phone number, Thursday, May 26, 3:25 PM EST

774 should pursue a career as a food writer so she can have an outlet for writing about au jus, other than text messages to Leila, who lives halfway across the country.

U at skul yet?
from a 315 phone number, Friday, May 27, 8:08 AM EST

Jesus Christ. It is almost endearing that 315 poses this query, considering that she has clearly never, ever been to school.

I have to go potty. Il be right right back .
; Your hot (;
from a 912 phone number, Friday, May 27, 11:37 AM EST

Leila and 912 have the sort of relationship where he tells her that she's hot, but also when he has to go to the bathroom. Either they're dating and in a really fucked-up relationship, or... I don't know.

Want to get together later?and play call my house phone if u can so we can play chiwawas ok see you late sis remember house phone
Jt
from a 541 phone number, Friday, May 27, 2:10 PM EST

I texted this girl back, to let her know that her message did not reach Leila. I don't know why; I guess I was just feeling charitable, plus it seemed important to me that these two kids get together and play Chihuahuas (which sounds like a way less interesting game than, say, Unicorns, but what do I know).

After I texted her, I received this reply:

Who leila or leila@vtext.com i dont have vtexts number or name
Jt
from a 541 phone number, Friday, May 27, 2:20 PM EST

Sometimes I really don't know why I bother.

Can i go swiming?
from a 631 phone number, Friday, May 27, 5:25 PM EST

In this weather? You'd be a fool not to.

Hey. Im stuck in da car with absolutely nothing to do BAH
from a 412 phone number, Friday, May 27, 7:55 PM EST

You could learn a foreign language! Seriously. Get one of those CDs.

hi its shannon.
I <3 AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
from a 508 phone number, Tuesday, May 17, 7:24 AM EST

It's America, Shannon. Not Justin Bieber. Chill out.

That must have been it. just make sure this week that you dont frget t dh jk sjuriig or smthng
from a 208 phone number, Tuesday, May 17, 2:41 PM EST

This comes so close to being valuable advice. So, so close.

Yes im not mad at yall just him
IM.FREKIN.HILATIOUS<3
from an 832 phone number, Tuesday, May 17, 5:06 PM EST

Ooh, what did he do?!

hey u r pickin me up right
I <3 JB
from a 919 phone number, Tuesday, May 17, 5:39 PM EST

Someday I want to get all the Justin Bieber-loving Leila Texters in a room together-- this girl, and the Mrs. Bieber chick, and the Bieber Fever girl, and Lady "Peace, Love, Justin Bieber", and all the rest of them-- and then I want to make them fight to the death, Hunger Games-style. Winner gets thirty minutes alone with the man himself. That seems fair, doesn't it?

You still modeling this sat right? :-)
from an 858 phone number, Wednesday, May 18, 4:21 PM EST

Of course right. Because I am a famous runway model, and the fashion designers simply will not let me take a Saturday off. It is just too damaging to their careers, when I, Leila, am absent.

Poop
from a 248 phone number, Wednesday, May 18, 6:26 PM EST

Sure.

if u have no work...get off that computer.
from a 404 phone number, Thursday, May 19, 7:45 PM EST

THAT IS REALLY SOLID ADVICE. Does updating the Leila Texts count as work?

Is it soooooooooo funny
from a 707 phone number, Friday, May 20, 9:28 PM EST

Are you asking about Bridesmaids? I still haven't seen it, but, yeah, I hear it's pretty funny.