Tuesday, September 13, 2011

hay un tornado que se llama maria
from a 917 phone number, Tuesday, September 13, 5:35 PM EST

"There is a tornado named Maria." Only, I don't think that's true right now.

Monday, September 12, 2011

heiba Leila I don't think u need gatarate, I gave u enough snack and sweet. Think about it before u buy it. Good Luck. Love u
from a 949 phone number, Tuesday, September 13, 2:29 PM EST

Twitter feed for the Intended Leila. She says she lives in California, and 949 is a California area code. Done. And Lei, honey, your mom is probably right about the Gatorade. There are less disgusting ways to replenish your electrolytes (says the Leila who is currently eating Phish Food directly from the carton).
hi leila 4 the science pro. the title is helicopter drop right
from am 909 phone number, Sunday, September 11, 6:40 PM EST

I know what an egg drop in science class entails. I don't really know what you have to do for a helicopter drop. I guess you drop a helicopter, in the hopes of proving... something about science.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

hope you are having a great day! love you so much xoxoxo
from an 831 phone number, Sunday, September 11, 2:12 PM EST

For every Leila Texter who bails on her plans with Leila or puts drama into Leila's life, there is a total sweetheart Leila Texter like this one. I hope you are having a great day, too.
Hey is Kyle availble to babysit tonite ..Frank wamts to go to Racino for 2 hours if he cant thats fine .. I dont even want to know.
from a 518 phone number, Friday, September 9, 8:39 PM EST

"I don't even want to know. I just texted you to ask if Kyle can babysit tonight, but I don't even know why I asked you since I certainly don't want to know the answer. Just making casual rhetorical conversation, I guess."

Also, a racino is a combination racetrack and casino. No wonder she doesn't really want Frank to go there. It would be nice if he would stop gambling away the money that allows them to pay Kyle to babysit.
Im soo sorry but i promised id walk with jenny and nura pleasse dont be mad im really sorry
from a 347 phone number, Friday, September 9, 6:49 AM EST

Here's the thing. It's fine to prioritize Jenny and Nura over Leila this one time if you apologize and then later make it up to her. Have lunch with Leila or something. Make her feel loved. Otherwise this is just the first step in the long process of you ditching Leila forever for "better" friends. I don't want to see that happen to someone who shares my first name.
Goodnight Princess Leila daughter of the Most High King!{{{{{{{leila}}}}}}}that us a hug.
from a 724 phone number, Thursday, September 8, 10:42 PM EST

The problem with inventing new emoticons is that then you have to explain what they mean.
theres a party this sat at marcos house lets go!
from a 928 phone number, Wednesday, September 7, 6:25 PM EST

Only if there's underage drinking and the opportunity to grind with strangers!
moves like jagger just came on KArAoKe;0
from an 828 phone number, 6:25 PM EST, Wednesday, September 7, 6:25 PM EST

Apparently 16 million people have viewed this song's music video on youtube. And I had never heard of it before I got this text message. Thank you, Leila Texters. Without you, I would live in a cave.
do u hav sayeedahs #. If u do please send it 2 me
im delightful

from an 845 phone number, Wednesday, September 7, 5:02 PM EST

Are you really delightful? How do you know? Just because your mom told you?
U an hidie have fun an sorry for all that dromma i put in your an hidies life plz tell her i said that :)guhh plzz :)
from a 706 phone number, Tuesday, September 6, 3:43 PM EST

I need to know more about this drama you put into Leila and Heidi's life, please, 706. I am very interested, and I swear I am a good listener. I won't interrupt you at all except to say things like, "No way!" and, "That is so much drama!"
Please send caroline home, thank you :)
from a 559 phone number, Monday, September 5, 10:16 PM EST

This playdate has gone on for long enough!
Lails!!! where r u?!?!
from a 951 phone number, Monday, September 5, 4:46 PM EST

At 4:46 PM on Monday, I was at work. That's not really worth all the exclamation points and interrobangs.
How do i pack everything 4 skool

from a 973 phone number, Sunday, September 4, 9:50 PM EST

In an enormous, dorky-looking backpack. The same way 13 year olds have been packing everything for skool for generations.
Hi darlin reminder u r late on insurance please get caught up love ya
from a 636 phone number, Sunday, September 4, 12:30 PM EST

Translation: "I think you are a deadbeat, but I don't want you to get mad at me for calling you out on it."
I can swing it! just remember to book any spa treatments early! it is a gorgeous place! im psyched! Did leila book it i dont have her # with me
from a 617 phone number, Thursday, September 1, 5:11 PM EST

Did you know there is a place in New York called Spa Castle? I think this is hilarious. I doubt that's where Leila and 617 were going, since 617 is a Boston area code. But they don't have Spa Castle in Boston, so that is not as interesting to me.
Ok headed home in a few didnt know she was turning in a bazzillion cans & grocery shnp too
from a 541 phone number, Wednesday, August 31, 3:53 PM EST

Did she make money off of them? If you got five cents per returned Coke can, how much money would you make off a bazzillion cans? Yes, this is a word problem.