Friday, July 23, 2010

I guess she means tomorrow,.

FWD: Hey hun. What r u doing? I'm in a big jam and don't know what to do. I'm down a sitter 2moro.

from an 860 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 8:05 PM EST

I like how 860 has to clarify that, when whoever sent her this text wrote "2moro," she might have meant "tomorrow." It was so unclear.
Wylie 2 publish bks .
from an 847 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 6:38 PM EST

Ebooks & co. 2 b called odyssey
from an 847 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 10:17 PM EST

This is weird for me because I work in book publishing-- like, that is my real job, other than receiving misdirected text messages-- so I am accustomed to hearing updates on the publishing world like these. I'm just not accustomed to getting them by text message.
I was wondering if you would like to meet me for a glass of wine tomorrow early evening say, 7 00 at Stella's ? Also, I would love to give Tori a lesson
from a 949 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 1:00 AM EST

This is one of those people whose texts never clock in at fewer than 160 characters. You can just tell.
hi im not ignoring your call its just that i return calls when im driving alone and the past few days Kays been helping us on a deck job so i couldnt call
from a 714 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 12:50 AM EST

First text got full i didnt even get to finish anyway i hope your well and happy
from a 714 phone number, Thursday, July 22, 12:55 AM EST

Okay, that seems like a fair explanation. The reason why I'm ignoring your text is not the same as the reason why you're ignoring Leila's call.
carlos avila is playond drums!
from a 316 phone number, Wednesday, July 21, 5:59 PM EST

A search for "carlos avila" + "drums" turns up a myspace page for some band that disbanded in 2008. Chances that this is what 316 was referring to: Not very good.
Hey sweetie get the Hamburgec Helper started please.
from a 231 phone number, Wednesday, July 21, 5:55 PM EST

Thankfully, there is a wikipedia page for Hamburger Helper.
Kiss! Kiss! Goodmorning have blessed day *Lovin~my~kids* *Lovin~my~kids*
from a 757 phone number, Tuesday, July 20, 7:55 AM EST

This was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes on Tuesday morning. It completely sapped me of my energy. I read this and was like, "I am going the hell back to sleep."
Can u come over 2 my house plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
from a 717 phone number, Wednesday, July 14, 6:24 PM EST

I was going to refuse, but that last 'z' convinced me.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

How are you doing today? Feeling any better? I'm working to 9 930 tonight. Sitll having baby chicks? Ionly work 1/2 day from 4to 8. I guess i need a break
from a 607 phone number, Wednesday, July 14, 7:10 PM EST

Have you heard from carol? Mr wasnt having a very good day yesterday. Peg yelled @ him all day. Do you miss working? Are you bored? How is gramps taking
from a 607 phone number, Wednesday, July 14, 7:20 PM EST

It? Was he really upset?
from a 607 phone number, Wednesday, July 14, 7:21 PM EST

Ar this point we know a LOT about Mr and Mrs and how Leila is raising chickens ( for backstory, if you haven't been keeping up). Do we have any cohesive theories as to what's going on here? Come on, team. Use your ingenuity.
Good morning hope your day is going well mom called 1000 check u have is needed to pay taxes on your car please get that to us today ok
from a 636 phone number, Thursday, July 15, 12:31 PM EST

We r taking car back see ya
from a 636 phone number, Thursday, July 15, 6:39 PM EST

Wait, are they taking the car back because Leila didn't pay taxes on it? I'm confused. Punctuation could have helped here. Maybe.
Do me a favor when you get up? Please put all of the can pop in the fridge? Thank you, Sweetie!
from a 231 phone number, Saturday, July 17, 9:23 AM EST

231 is West Michigan. In the land of can pop and sweeties.
u dropped the credit card
from a 712 phone number, Sunday, July 18, 10:41 PM EST

Not a great move there, Leila.

I was out dancing on Friday night, and some dude had dropped like all his credit cards and IDs and stuff on the floor. Also his cell phone. It was later said to me that the guy who had dropped all this stuff was the lead singer of Air France, but I have no way of verifying this claim. I don't even know what Air France's music sounds like.
(:AmBeR<3s C.P.c.p&c.h BFFER'S:)

from a 423 phone number, Monday, July 19, 9:24 Pm EST

This is an incredibly detailed sig line. It appears to me that Amber hearts C.P., and also that C.P. and C.H. are best friends forever. And also that Amber wants to say "hey" to Leila.