Saturday, November 13, 2010

is my best friend heyyyy bella its leilaa ur my best frienddd everrrr and so is livvyy and thats probebly what i have a picture of
from a 401 phone number, Saturday, November 13, 8:53 AM EST

Believe it or not, this is my 2,000th posting to the Leila Texts blog. Honest to God.

I have spent nearly three and half years of my life transcribing misdirected text messages, and now I have a collection of 2,000 of them. This is a major milestone. I think we can safely say that no one else, ever, has compiled more text messages intended for strangers named Leila.

In the spirit of this moment in Leila Text history, I'm glad to be able to share this text message from 401. It is all about friendship, the true foundation for the Leila Texts. (Except for the ones that say, "Leila i hate u.")

If you have some spare time, take a look through the 2,000 archived posts. No two are exactly alike. (Text messages are like snowflakes, apparently.) And if you've run out of Leila Texts to read, you can always read my book. It's not about text messages, but you still might like it:
phone Cant we just do the sleep over again another time

From a 615 phone number, Saturday, November 13, 10:19 AM EST

No, we can't. Obviously, when Leila said she "couldn't sleep over," 615 heard her saying "tonight." But what she really meant was "forever, because you snore."
You want to go to dinner with ben and vivian? ben just text me
from a 203 phone number, Saturday, November 13, 7:59 PM EST

Oh, Ben and Vivian are such a charming couple. We really ought to go on more double-dates with them. What a lark!
;) Maddy (;

from a 760 phone number, Saturday, November 13, 1:08 AM EST

The combination of the death threat and the smiley faces makes me suspect that Maddy is living out her own real-life version of American Psycho.
we are in pigeon forge. just past the clarion at light
from a 770 phone number, Friday, November 12, 5:46 PM EST

where are you
from a 770 phone number, Friday, November 12, 5:46 PM EST

This is not the first time 770 has been to Pigeon Forge. I still don't know why she keeps going there. Someone who seems to be affiliated with Pigeon Forge commented on the last Leila Text that mentioned it but somehow that didn't really clarify things for me.
Do you have a party lined up?
from a 443 phone number, Thursday, November 11, 8:32 PM EST

Dude, have you MET me? I'm almost offended that you'd even feel like you have to ask.
Moms being stobern and maen
from a 781 phone number, Wednesday, November 10, 4:27 PM EST

Somehow, with that spelling, this sounds way worse than if Mom were being just stubborn and mean.
Hey.i dont think we should go out anymore.we dont talk or hang out.srry can we still be friend.
from a 201 phone number, Tuesday, November 9, 5:11 PM EST

Goddamn I love this text. This is all of middle school summed up into 160 characters. Yes, 201. We can still be friend, provided that doesn't mean we have to start talking or hanging out.

By the way, if you're wondering whether I replied to this person so that he knows he effectively broke up with Leila: No. I did not.
I hate you >.<
from a 781 phone number, Tuesday, November 9, 3:39 PM EST

Being a Leila means having a community of constantly supportive friends.
i just got the e-mail confirming Ash's enrollment in PAA :-)
from a 619 phone number, Monday, November 8, 6:53 PM EST

I assume Ash has been enrolled in the Population Association of America. Or maybe in Polyacryclic Acid.
Happy, Happy Birthday to you. I hope you have a great day. Love you
from an 850 phone number, Monday, November 8, 7:45 AM EST

graham HAPPY birthday Leila! Greetngs from Virginia Beach! Love you!
from a 509 phone number, Wednesday, November 10, 10:47 PM EST

So whats up there Birthday Girl? Tmrrw is the BIG day huh? Another year older? LMBO its hell gettn old!!!
from a 602 phone number, Saturday, November 13, 6:40 PM EST

This has been a big week for birthdays. Thank you all for your kind wishes, but, alas, my birthday is actually in April.
U know that boy from jump n jamin. well i dreamed about him for some reason .promis me u can keep this a secret.
from a 951 phone number, Sunday, November 7, 12:46 PM EST

No, I'm sorry, I cannot promise I can keep this a secret.

I poked around the Jump n'Jammin website a bit, and I didn't immediately see any hot boys. But obviously they are out there.
Just got your message. just got home from my brothers. Lew and i stopped at the outlets. ask me if i bought a new red coach bag. Yes i did. Me bad.
from a 916 phone number, Saturday, November 6, 7:58 PM EST

You're right, 916. You ARE bad. I condemn you and your capitalist ways.