Friday, October 15, 2010

Could u send me another adorable pic?
from a 406 phone number, Sunday, October 3, 12:04 AM EST

What am I, your own personal cuteoverload.com?
Ahahahahhah chris wants u to txt himn back rebecca sabrina=legitamit twins
from a 201 phone number, Friday, October 15, 9:48 PM EST

Either Rebecca and Sabrina were separated at birth and only now reunited, or they both showed up to the same party wearing black tube tops.
r u coming to open house
from a 323 phone number, Thursday, September 30, 9:01 PM EST

jaxon says u suck not me
from a 323 phone number, Friday, October 1, 6:21 PM EST

y weren’t u at school today
from a 323 phone number, Friday, October 8, 6:55 PM EST

u r leaving right now your uncles here
from a 323 phone number, Thursday, October 14, 6:27 PM EST

wat r u doin r right now
from a 323 phone number, Friday, October 15, 8:54 PM EST

323 keeps inquiring into Leila's whereabouts, and, after more than two weeks, it's starting to get annoying.
triki wanted to know what time we starting dinner and what to bring. i told him 4:00 and to bring a ready to eat apple pie
from a 301 phone number, Friday, October 15, 5:40 AM EST

Mmm I absolutely love autumn dinner parties.
Hey, Beeyotch, did you know Carla is coming to NYC in May? Road Trip with a BRIT baby! You in?
from a 512 phone number, Thursday, October 14, 5:29 PM EST

I don't know, will we have to drive on the wrong side of the road?
i discovered your leila text blog when i was googling my sister named leila. what is even funnier is i found a recent text written from my stepmom
from a 908 phone number, Wednesday, October 13, 8:40 PM EST

Obviously this is not a Leila Text in the technical sense, since it's not a misdirected text message. It reached me just fine. Nonetheless, I'm sharing it here, because this is so cool! I love when this happens. And then people can finally explain to us what their texts mean! Like 908 told me that this one was about booking motel rooms for his sister Leila's wedding. So now we know! I also love that 908 got in touch with me via text message. That brings it all full-circle.
Family,
who fed zorro?
christian's lunch box is here?
oxm

from a 978 phone number, Wednesday, October 13, 10:01 AM EST

I assume Zorro is a dog, and the parent of this household is asking who fed him. And also, who fed Christian, since his lunch box is here. (Christian is presumably not a dog, though I guess he could be.)
Ur a brat
from a 717 phone number, Tuesday, October 2, 8:28 AM EST

Nuh-uh. I rock!
Cool.ily.ily.
from a 201 phone number, Sunday, October 10, 5:01 PM EST

I love you. I love you. It's abbrevs, guys. get with the program.
Wuz up Bama Girl!!!
from a 205 phone number, Friday, October 8. 4:23 PM EST

It's always weird but I guess kinda cool to receive Leila Texts from Michelle Obama.
I told jen i would see if we had blue leggings, we do. If i wait for the sale next week they may be gone, with my discount they would be 43 dollars.
from a 614 phone number, Wednesday, October 6, 1:37 PM EST

I cannot conceive of a store where leggings cost $43 with an employee discount. That means they probably retail for like $90. I love leggings, but honestly. What store do we think 614 works for?
Due date May 2. She is 9 weeks now. We have a pic and heard the heart beat.
from an 865 phone number, Wednesday, October 6, 1:18 PM EST

Not to be as superstitious as I am, but aren't you not supposed to tell people (including the entire internet) until the second trimester?
holy shit girl, it is ur birthday? what does that make u? 37? u kno, u only get sexier with age ! lub u!
from a 970 phone number, Tuesday, October 5, 9:36 PM EST

This is the first time in my life anyone has ever told me, even inadvertently, that I "only get sexier with age." Thanks, Leila Texters.
Hey its allyx
I <3 Acusc Gutr

from an 805 phone number, Tuesday, October 5, 7:36 PM EST

I also heart acoustic guitars, I guess. Though not as much as I heart acoustic xylophones.
Oh and i saw u yesterday at nite goin to laurens house with Kelsey i tried waving…i was in the carrr!! coming out of the garage u dint evn c meee! lol
from an 818 phone number, Monday, October 4, 9:29 PM EST

Hey so can we go hikin lyk u kelsey n me or something since lauren n nina rnt allowed they sed
from an 818 phone number, Thursday, October 7, 6:51 PM EST

I am growing to feel like a regular member of this clique. I want to hear more of their adventures!
wats the big deal bout Madison
whats so great bout her
;) Maddy (;

from a 760 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 5:32 PM EST

Maddy is demonstrating a surprising amount of self-awareness.
ash is in a splint and sling, possible stress fracture or bone bruise. she has to go in for a re-xray on thurs. she is out of gymnastics for at least
from a 619 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 6:55 PM EST

Poor Ash. There goes her dreams of Olympic glory. This is like an episode of Make It Or Break It in text-message format.
Are you cheering?
from a 607 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 2:06 PM EST

I'm sexy! I'm cute! I'm popular to boot! I'm bitchin'! Great hair! The boys all love to stare!
”Every morn in Africa a gazelle wakes up, He knows he must outrun the fastest lion or he will be killed…….
from a 571 phone number, Wednesday, September 29, 7:59 AM EST

I find this strangely inspiring. Or depressing.
philipp
a cheese stick ate me!

from a 917 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 7:26 PM EST

In Soviet Russia…

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Hello to a couple of strangers that is out on sick. I wouldn’t want to grt you into trouble on office time…just thinking about the two of you… Mar
from a 607 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 10:19 PM EST

Leila has a secret office romance. Mar is their only coworker who knows about it. Leila and her secret bf called out “sick” so they could spend a romantic day together. Because your boss will never suspect anything when you’re both sick on the same day! Not unless Mar opens her big mouth, that is…
HAM!!!!!!
from a 951 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 4:47 PM EST

Ham is the new bacon, apparently.
oct 16….yard sale
from an 864 phone number, Saturday, October 2, 1:55 PM EST

That’s this weekend, folks! Go! Buy!
Inimail nan tay papers ni charmain?
from a 415 phone number, Tuesday, September 28, 7:29 PM EST

Is this also Taglog? 415 wants Leila to do something involving Charmain toilet paper. (Charmain is the same in all languages.)
Hey want 2 do hw together
from a 917 phone number, Tuesday, September 7, 12:26 PM EST

Hey the math due tomorrow is that algebra review and to take notes right?
from an 860 phone number, Monday, September 13, 5:41 PM EST

quick ? on 2.19c for the hmwk?
from a 402 phone number, Monday, September 20, 10:39 PM EST

There was a time when I didn't receive texts like these. That time was August. Summer's over, kids, and there's no clearer sign than the sudden proliferation of homework-themed text messages.
Stacey aint going now and joni is.... Crazy shit going on this week!
from a 706 phone number, Tuesday, September 28, 11:54 AM EST

CRAZY SHIT. Stacey aint going. Joni is going. It's nearly impossible to wrap your mind around.
HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY
from a 214 phone number, Tuesday, September 28, 1:07 AM EST

Leila spent most of the day smoking cigarettes and running from strip club to strip club. As birthdays go, she'd had worse.
Just arrived in Boston catch up with u later so far great trip
from a 714 phone number, Monday, September 27, 9:45 AM EST

Massive coincidence: I am also going to Boston! I'm doing a book reading and signing at the Burlington Barnes & Noble on Saturday. Details here, if you want to come: http://store-locator.barnesandnoble.com/event/68564.
Hey leila u rock
from a 949 phone number, Saturday, September 25, 10:52 PM EST

Yeah! Take that, texter who hates Leila!
Should i order a sandwich for you and Chelsea?
from a 248 phone number, Saturday, September 25, 5:41 PM EST

This text message confused me a great deal because the protagonist in the book that I'm writing is also named Chelsea. So when I got this text, I was like, "No, Chelsea doesn't need a sandwich because she just ate dinner.... I mean, Chelsea doesn't need a sandwich because she is a figment of my imagination."
hey leila i put UN down on my resume with your number and said i had been working for a little over a year doing staging and art direction
from a 619 phone number, Friday, September 24, 11:15 AM EST

So let me see if I've got this straight: If Leila's potential future employer calls me to check out her references, I am supposed to tell him that I am a supervisor at the United Nations, for which Leila had been doing staging and art direction for a little over a year?

Okay. I can do it. I'm not sure it will "sound believable," but I'll do it.
did i sound like a knucklehead? antibiotics, nyquil, perkadin (for my knee?)
from a 248 phone number, Tuesday, September 21, 10:17 PM EST

Yeah, bro, you sounded high our of your mind. We videotaped you talking and put it up on YouTube. It's gonna be the "David After Dentist" of 2010.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Fwd:Fwd:FWD: FWD: - Fwd: - Fwd: 2mrrow someone will say"WANNA GO OUT?" or "I LOVE YOU!" or "IM SORRY BABE. SEND TO 10 PEOPLE OR BAD LUCK
~RaWr~

from an 812 phone number, Wednesday, September 15, 9:36 PM EST

2mrrow someone will also say "Do you need a bag for that?" or "What time is it?" or "Excuse me."

Just to cover all our bases here.
This is jillene if u off today cum get kinky*TRADING PLACES
from a 334 phone number, Wednesday, September 15, 2:55 PM EST

I looked up "trading places" on urbandictionary to see if it referred to some kinky sex act. In case you were wondering: It doesn't.
Hey its jake dont scream this aloud do u know who i like
?HOLA!

from a 937 phone number, Monday, September 13, 3:45 PM EST

Hey do u know who i like
?HOLA!

from a 937 phone number, Monday, September 13, 3:50 PM EST

Jake, you may find this hard to believe, but the reason why I'm not texting you back is because I don't CARE who you like. Honestly. I don't.
MAGKANO PALIT DOL?
from a 415 phone number, Sunday, September 12, 9:56 PM EST

WHAT?
Hey girl if youre still interested in rugby practice is this thursday 7-9
from a 321 phone number, Wednesday, September 8, 3:26 PM EST

It heartens me to know that some Leilas out there have athletic abilities. Not me. But some of them.