Saturday, January 22, 2011

Well I hope you are happy. Evan now has a tattoo. he sold the watch you bought him to pay for it. If only you had texted me when he called you. He is now
from a 608 phone number, Sunday, January 16, 9:04 PM EST

so now you dont even care about me?
from a 608 phone number, Sunday, January 16, 9:26 PM EST

why wont you respond to me??
from a 608 phone number, Sunday, January 16, 10:09 PM EST

I would like to go on record as saying that I do not for an instant believe these are real Leila Texts. In my four years of experience with strangers' texts, this just isn't how people communicate. That said, whoever this person is must really, really, want to get his/her words on this blog, so fine. Here you go.
Oh y do u suspect claire and wut did they say

from a 909 phone number, Saturday, January 15, 7:47 PM EST

Why do you need details ? Lets juss say i gtg. Bye
from a 909 phone number, Saturday, January 15, 7:48 PM EST

This sounds like the plot of a detective movie. I can just picture 909 flipping down her sunglasses really fast and speeding away in her unmarked car immediately after sending these texts.

Friday, January 21, 2011

from a 503 phone number, Saturday, January 22, 11:11 AM EST

This appears to involve a sports team in some way.
Adam at golden globes?
from a 707 phone number, Sunday, January 16, 6:22 PM EST

Not to be a lame-o, but I totally missed the Golden Globes this year. Were it not for this text message, I don't think I would have even realized it was happening. Then I saw a headline on the cover of my roommate's Entertainment Weekly that said something along the lines of, "CONTROVERSY AT THE GOLDEN GLOBES." So perhaps something happened there while I wasn't paying attention. Or, more likely, EW wanted to sell more copies.
Well there is no chance for kamel to take koukou to swim in Tunisia sis!
from a 661 phone number, Sunday, January 16, 9:41 PM EST

This would likely make more sense if we knew who Kamel and Koukou were. All we can say for sure right now is that Leila and 661 are sisters, and that there is no chance that Koukou's going to be swimming in Tunisia anytime soon.
How r u all i was just seeing f i could text u and f it would work
from a 606 phone number, Monday, January 17, 3:41 PM EST

Answer: you can't, and it wouldn't.
omg ! books r so expensive! spent abot230 already now another 95 4 more books for 1 class n a clicker gah
God bless you :)

from a 210 phone number, Tuesday, January 18, 4:16 PM EST

Speaking as a person who works in the book industry, I can't really take 210's side on this one. Yes, books cost real money, but that's because they are real things. Shoes are also expensive. So is dining out. I get that spending $400 on books for college classes is not super-exciting, but I don't like it when people undervalue books as a product. They cost money because they're worth money.
Your flights canceld :'(
from a 781 phone number, Tuesday, January 18, 4:22 PM EST

You can tell from that crying-face, or possible smoking-face, how much 781 regrets having to break the bad news to Leila.
Dropping my car off in bedford for wheel alignment hoping you can drive me to pick it up by 1?
from a 978 phone number, Wednesday, January 19, 10:03 AM EST

978 sounds like a conscientious car owner. I owned cars for a number of years, and I can't say with certainty that I EVER took them in for wheel alignment. It sounds like a good thing to do, though, in theory.
Has brian showed up yet?
from a 509 phone number, Wednesday, January 19, 10:38 PM EST

What's weird here is that I actually do know a dude named Brian. But I don't know the person sending this text. So apparently it is for a different Leila, and about a different Brian?
barackman yur mom said u would call me about yearbook thing so call me!
from a 917 phone number, Thursday, January 20, 5:44 PM EST

barackman Btw call me on my cell
from a 917 phone number, Thursday, January 20m 5:44 PM EST

barackmaN Are u almost ready to call?
from a 917 phone number, Thursday, January 20, 7:10 PM EST

I have been receiving text messages from 917, directed at this Leila, since late December. It has been nearly a MONTH. How, in the course of one month, has 917 not noticed that Leila hasn't received any of her DOZENS AND DOZENS of text messages? PAY ATTENTION, 917, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Leila you arn stopit
from a 515 phone number, Thursday, January 20, 9:59 PM EST

I think Kim made the most astute comment here when she said that these texts from 515 sound like someone on those drugs that you get at the dentist.
U r a rock star!

Smiles, Jackie

from a 425 phone number, Thursday, January 20, 11:34 PM EST

Thanks, Jackie! So are you (probably)!
Wat hw do we hav
from a 347 phone number, Friday, January 21, 2:34 PM EST

It's Friday afternoon, 347. School is out for the weekend. Stop being a loser and asking about the homework, and go, I don't know, play recreational kickball.
do not forget the organic milk . whole milk
from a 401 phone number, Friday, January 21, 6:56 PM EST

I have long theorized that part of finding your soul mate is finding someone who drinks the same type of milk as you. That way you'd never have to have two separate quarts of milk, one 2% and one organic whole milk. You'd just have one huge vat of milk, and it would never spoil because both you and your soul mate would drink it together all the time.