Saturday, September 1, 2007

FWD: FWD: --ORIGINAL MSG: Ur LOVE wil cal u ' 10:55 pm, KIS u 2morrow, or ASK u out. If u BREAK the chain ul have bad luk. Send dis to 10 ppl
from an 808 phone number, Friday, August 31, 3:39 PM

Oh my God, I cannot WAIT for 10:55 pm. That is going to be the best minute EVER.
Ok. Luv ma
from a 504 phone number

My ma never texts me. She wouldn't know how if she tried. She would also never say she "luvs" me, because she actually loves me, because she is my mother.


Thursday, August 30, 2007

Cierra left her pillow case.
from a 916 phone number, Thursday, August 30, 1:29 AM

Somewhere, there is a Leila who would be deeply affected by the news that Cierra left her pillow case. This is obviously a relevant piece of information, but I cannot for the life of me figure out why. I have never in my life of texting felt the need to inform a friend that someone left her pillow case (though I have also never felt the need to inform a friend that I only roll with P.I.M.P.S., so perhaps I shouldn't use myself as a texting reference point).

The best explanation I can come up with for this text is that it is code for something like, "Cierra hooked up with a really hot guy," or, "The Nazis surrendered," or whatever.
Hey its beth! i wanna see u!
from a 518 phone number, Wednesday, August 29, 4:00 PM

This sort of text always unnerves me because it could conceivably actually be for me. I might know someone named Beth, right? And she might want to see me? I don't know where 518 is, and I can't offhand think of a Beth who would want to see me who is not already saved in my contacts list, so I am going to assume this is a Leila Text and will not call this girl back. I figure that's a safer route than calling up this stranger and being like, "Beth! I wanna see u, too!"
Fwd: Fwd: I only roll wit P.I.M.P.S. (Pretty Individuals Makin People Stare) and you're one of them send this to 10 of ya prettiest friends!
from a 925 phone number, Tuesday, August 28, 1:12 AM

This text awoke me from a deep sleep. I'm going to tell you something: It was well worth waking up for.

Monday, August 27, 2007

FWD: FWD: FWD:FWD: FWD: FWD:FWD:Fwd: Fwd: I better get this back! i love you to death ;) today is bestfriendz day snd to 10 friendz u kant imagine losin*
from a 201 phone number, Saturday, August 25, 3:26 PM

Bestfriendz Day is my favorite holiday, though I'm not sure how Kant would feel about having his name, however accidentally, associated with this concept.