Screw you, sexy fucking bitch
GaNgtsA yO!
from a 571 phone number, Monday, November 2, 9:54 PM

I think this guy is confused, in that he is both complimenting ("sexy") and criticizing ("fucking bitch") Leila, and also he has misspelled the word "gangsta."

hi Wut are you doing
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Monday, November 2, 8:09 PM

Hi We are going to dizney on ice
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Friday, November 6, 8:20 PM

MaYa, I am starting to be so over you, with your uninteresting texts and your interpretive spelling all the time.

hi aunt can u plz email me aunt mae's new address?
from a 440 phone number, Sunday, November 1, 5:21 PM

440 obviously has a closer relationship with Aunt Mae and Aunt Leila than I have with any of my aunts. It would generally not occur to me to text or to email them.

can you and bridget give me a call please.
from 301 phone number, Sunday, November 1, 4:22 PM

I guess I could, but that sounds ominous...

ack! daniel just told me! i will hopefully be ready. maybe345
from a 425 phone number, Saturday, October 31, 5:03 PM

carpool again? ill get another pm parking pass again too
from a 425 phone number, Monday, November 2, 11:21 AM

I cannot understand why, but this first text was the only Leila Text I received on Halloween. Isn't Halloween like one of the biggest texting days of the year? I received like 80 texts over the course of the evening from my actual friends, all trying to make plans and find one another. Are all other Leila just better planners than me or something?

I LOVE YOU MOMMY
from a 915 phone number, Friday, October 30, 5:55 PM

So sweet!

hey, sorry. i had a girlscout meeting. Whats up?
from a 973 phone number, Friday, October 30, 5:24 PM

I hope this was a successful meeting, in which 973 served God and her country, helped people at all times, and lived by the Girl Scout Law.

Anser leila
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Thursday, October 29, 8:27 PM

Hi
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Thursday, October 29, 9:57 PM

Hi i am playing LPS
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Friday, October 30, 7:18 PM

Hi wut are you doing
-MaYa-
from a 425 phone number, Friday, October 30, 7:21 PM

How can one girl send so many text messages without a single one of them being interesting??

Are you girls walking tomarow night or what? Hah, I'm a texting junkie now!
from a 208 phone number, Tuesday, October 29, 12:04 AM

Oh, I don't think you're really a texting junkie, 208. Trust me, I have seen texting junkies in action. They text Leila ten times an hour. That is not you. Not yet.

i put the movie in your purse, please return today
Charley
from a 601 phone number, Wednesday, October 28, 7:36 AM

Yeah, or else there will be overdue fines! And then Leila and Charley will have a FIGHT!

hey, wut don't u like?...lol...i need more sentences!
from a 781 phone number, Tuesday, October 27, 3:39 PM

This sounds to me like 781 had to interview Leila in French class today, and now her homework is to write up some French sentences about what Leila likes and does not like. Only they spent all of class dicking around (as you do, when your assignment i to work in pairs), so now 781 has to text Leila to find out what the heck she should include in her homework.

That is probably the most parsimonious explanation.

got your voicemail. stuck in a classroom. i will bring leila's fins to hood. traffic will suck driving home in the rain...
from a 301 phone number, Tuesday, October 27, 3:25 PM

It confuses me when Leila Texters refer to Leila in the third person. Why not just say "I will bring your fins to hood"? For that matter, why does Leila have fins in the first place?

Need to get your truck done before you wreck what was just done
from a 410 phone number, Tuesday, October 27, 9:19 AM

410 really doesn't have much faith in Leila's driving skills, does he?

i loooooooooooove you guys, i have a tournament a soccer tournament
from a 423 phone number, Monday, October 26, 6:13 PM

"A tournament? What kind of tournament? I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. Oh, wait-- hold up-- she has qualified this statement! A SOCCER tournament! Okay, phew, the world makes sense again."

FWD: 5.1, 5.2, 6.1, 6.2 or 6.3
from a 443 phone number, Monday, October 26, 2:07 PM

These are obviously options for things. But what? They're a little low to be gymnastics scores. They're way too low to be temperatures. And why are 5.3 to 6.0 being discounted out of hand? Thoughts?

What is a charter school
from a 978 phone number, Sunday, October 25, 10:18 PM

Isn't this what wikipedia is for?

gotta bulk up
from an 814 phone number, Sunday, October 25, 5:17 PM

Maybe you should talk to Chunky-Man. I bet he could help you bulk up.

what r u wearing?
" chunky-man "
from a 713 phone number, Sunday, October 25, 2:17 AM

At 2:13 AM, there is only one thing Chunky-Man could mean by this text, and it's not, "What are you wearing when we volunteer at the soup kitchen tomorrow?"

Also: "Chunky-Man"? Eww.

Yes to hellraiser. You're special. THIS is my first text!
from a 208 phone number, Sunday, October 25, 12:45 AM

Sorry you wasted your first text on me, 208. Awkward.

Omg leila.... The pianist we're listening to did the pride and prejudice sountrack!!! You should be here! :( he's incredible...
from a 512 phone number, Saturday, October 24, 10:21 PM

In my day, I have met many Pride and Prejudice devotees, but I don't think any of them have been obsessed with the film or TV series because of its soundtrack. Is that really the best part? I always thought it had something to do with the pretty dresses, or the fact the the protagonist snags a rich guy who's kind of a dick to her.