I'll see if I can tonight depends on what time I get done with work I'm closing lunch otherwise let's grab some drinks this weekend if u have time
from a 480 phone number, Wednesday, January 4, 5:17 PM EST

I bet 480 is a good waitress. I bet she doesn't do things like spill soup on people or drop glasses, which is pretty much what I would do, if anyone ever made the mistake of hiring me to work in a restaurant.

Mr.conklin is gonna txt you ok love you so much
from an 845 phone number, Thursday, January 5, 10:24 AM EST

Hey pal..i got the word yesterday you are coming back on monday...thats not cool..if i have to be here with these kids...well so do you...miss u
from an 845 phone number, Thursday, January 5, 10:27 AM EST

Yeah, Leila, enough playing hooky. Take some Tums, shoot some nasal spray, and get back into that classroom. DYJ. (That's cool-kid slang for "do your job," fyi.)

DID U GET 11 THROUGH 14
from a 650 phone number, Thursday, January 5, 6:58 PM EST

YES.
BUT I WON'T TELL YOU THE ANSWERS.
NO MATTER HOW THREATENING YOUR CAPS LOCK MAY BE.

Mom has adrienne had a baby yet? Dont forget daddys motorcycle that i painted at color me mine
from a 662 phone number, Thursday, January 5, 7:24 PM EST

Color Me Mine is a paint your own pottery studio. So, no, 662 didn't actually buy and paint her father a motorcycle. I assume it looks something like this, only painted:

my dad had a pool wen he ws yg he went inside to go to the bathroom and he saw a light socket stuck his finger in it!he wnt os and said mom wat des it mean
from a 978 phone number, Friday, January 6, 6:40 AM EST

Is this a real story or an urban legend or what? Snopes, what's the deal here?

I just saw your message about leila being excited about playing at jessies...i feel bad! If he wasn't laying around so much i would just give him med and
from a 978 phone number, Friday, January 6, 8:00 AM EST

What I'm hearing you say is that you'd be fine with Leila coming over to play and catching Jessie's flu. Your sole concern is that he might just lie around the whole time, and that would be boring for Leila. Nice parenting there, 978.

Hey what up what are you going to say to tje boy i like
from a 208 phone number, Friday, January 6, 10:27 AM EST

To the boy you like, I am going to say something like, "Never hook up with 208. She'll only use you. For your money."

Maybe you should ask one of your other friends to talk to him instead.

leila r u going skating today:)
Christalynn
from a 530 phone number, Sunday, January 8, 4:01 PM EST

Every winter, somebody asks Leila to go skating. I almost never say yes, though. I have pretty weak ankles.

Hey wats up aydins birthday is today r u coming over his house? i missed u when ur mom came and u dident its merki
from a 917 phone number, Saturday, January 7, 10:36 AM EST

Kids of the Google Generation have such crazy names. "Aydin"? "Merki"? "Leila"?

The 11th won't work 4 me so I'm thinking about a catalog party instead. I'm in the foothills & either my husband or I should be here today or tomorrow.
from a 928 phone number, Saturday, January 7, 12:16 PM EST

I googled it, but I still don't know exactly what a catalog party is. It sounds like the "hostess" calls up a bunch of her friends/acquaintances and tries to sell them shit from a catalog. As best I can tell, no one comes over to your house, no one eats all the crudite, and no one winds up making out with a stranger in the coat closet, so it's not really clear to me why this counts as a "party" at all.

It was nice meeting you even though I was nappy as heck..lol
from a 661 phone number, Wednesday, January 4, 1:18 AM EST

This is the only time I can think of recently that I have heard someone use the word "nappy," outside of this picture book:

werlein Did u get the pic? I love u. Blessings m
from an 847 phone number, Tuesday, January 3, 11:00 PM EST

I have been getting texts, on and off, for Leila Werlein for more than two years now. For example this one from December 2009, or this one from May 2010. Not enough for it to be annoying or anything. But enough that I notice.

Happy 30th anniversary
from a 267 phone number, Monday, January 2, 9:04 AM EST

After 30 years of marriage, I'd like to believe that Leila could expect more than an unpunctuated text message. Like pearls.

what you want
from a 662 phone number, Monday, January 2, 6:55 PM EST

So tell me what you want, what you really really want.

Sorry i didnt answer the phone earlier we were at the dentist office
from a 256 phone number, Tuesday, January 3, 3:04 PM EST

My phone isnt broken i just had the case on wrong
from a 215 phone number, Wednesday, January 4, 5:28 PM EST

Hey. got a new phone I can actually talk now how did it go with the bishop?
from a 503 phone number, Wednesday, January 4, 6:41 PM EST

YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE PHONES SO I PUT A TEXT MESSAGE ABOUT PHONES ON YOUR PHONE SO YOU COULD TEXT ABOUT PHONES WHILE ON YOUR PHONE

What time were u thinking about doing lands end? Kk and adam want to go as well. I can go around 2 or so. Have some work to do here
from a 415 phone number, Monday, January 2, 2:45 PM EST

Sad u werent with us today!
from a 415 phone number, Monday, January 2, 8:31 PM EST

We found a secret beach at lands end
from a 415 phone number, Monday, January 2, 8:32 PM EST

Lands End is San Francisco's wildest and rockiest coast, a place strewn with shipwrecks and rife with landslides, not just an outdoorsy clothing store. (It was the "secret beach" thing that tipped me off.)

RUy asleep alreafy?
Mommy
from a 239 phone number, Sunday, January 1, 1:36 AM EST

Nothing like drunk-ass Mommy texting you at 1:36 AM on New Year's Eve to see where the party's at.

It's a bit late, but... HAPPY NEW YEARS! 2012 is going to be great. And that, my friend, is one indisputable fact.
from a 781 phone number, Sunday, January 1, 2:01 AM EST

Hola como estan tw deseo un feliz ano saludoes
from a 973 phone number, Sunday, January 1, 1:14 PM EST

Happy New Year to you and family love
from a 917 phone number, Sunday, January 1, 1:51 PM EST

Happy new year!
$@r@
from a 937 phone number, Sunday, January 1, 3:40 PM EST

And a happy new year to all of you! In 2011 I fell just short of posting the most Leila Texts updates ever. Blogger tells me I hit 713 in 2011, 714 in 2009. So close! Let's see if 2012 can't do one better...

Are you able to see a new case today, trying to get my sister to switch to you!
from a 503 phone number, Wednesday, December 28, 2:15 PM EST

Also my sister can't work cuz of the pain, can you help with a letter to insurance company.
from a 503 phone number, Thursday, December 29, 2:46 PM EST

Is it considered rude to text your lawyer? I text lawyers a lot, but they are all like one year out of law school and my friends. My text messages to them usually say things like, "Yo let's get some ice cream," not, "Can you help with a letter to insurance company?"

Tell call dad if she stll dare
from a 909 phone number, Thursday, December 29, 1:13 PM EST

"Truth or dare?"
"Dare."
"Okay. I dare you to call dad."
"[Gulp.]"