Is Lisa and Bernice luncheon tomorrow or wed?
from a 661 phone number, Monday, April 20, 9:03 PM

You know my standards are low when I say, genuinely: Nice use of capitalization, 661!

Fwd: Fwd: A blessing is coming 2 u in the form of money. Dont ask questions just 4ward to 8 people & trust god. I did. You only get one chance! x
from a 513 phone number, Monday, April 20, 6:39 PM

I'm sorry. A blessing... in the form of money? Are you really allowed to know what form your blessing will take? Does knowing that it's money make you more likely to forward this text? Isn't that kind of materialistic? Also, "dont ask questions"? Is this money going to arrive in some immoral way, but Leila should just accept it and not ask questions?

It is pass time do u stil want it
from a 404 phone number, Monday, April 20, 10:28 AM

when do you think you will be home?
from a 404 phone number, Monday, April 20, 5:21 PM

Do we think "pass time" is a thing, or do we think 404 means "past time"?

Also: IT IS MY BIRTHDAY! For at least another 40 minutes. (I am not a subtle or humble birthday girl.)

Hey leila i know this is a weird question but is ur network Verizon?
>*michelle*<
from an 805 phone number, Friday, April 17, 8:41 PM

Now, I don't know what network Leila is on. But I do know that >*michelle*< is on Verizon. Because otherwise her text messages wouldn't come to me.

ok....so....Jack.....where is this going....serious? fun?....should we all meet each other? I'm just curious....
from a 207 phone number, Friday, April 17, 6:11 AM

I think you should meet Jack even if this is NOT serious. Why not? Does Leila just date so many goddamn dudes that you need to have a policy of meeting only the serious ones? And what if Leila doesn't even know yet where this is going? What if she thinks it's going to be serious, but Jack thinks it's only fun? What's with all these defining-the-relationship questions, 207?

hey guest what i look like a sheep
from a 609 phone number, Tuesday, April 14, 12:58 PM

hey whatz up
from a 609 phone number, Tuesday, April 14, 7:14 PM

I have twice now texted this kid to inform her that her texts are not reaching Leila. At this point I can conclude only that 609 is in fact trying to reach me, because she wants me to know that she looks like a sheep.

Danielle & Brian r still gonna be at the lakehouse tonite. So we rescheduled 6-30 tomorrow. Let me know if it works.
from a 917 phone number, Tuesday, April 14, 11:53 AM

Isn't it a bit early in the season for lakehouses? This is a 917 number, which means NYC, and, trust me, I'm in NYC and I would not want to be on a beach today. And I am generally very pro beach houses.

Happy Easter to you & Mama Leila ! Sammy & Swift say hi!
from a 215 phone number, Sunday, April 12, 10:29 AM

And happy Easter to you, dear Leila Texters!

Leavingnebraska
from a 206 phone number, Saturday, April 11, 11:23 AM

206 is not a Nebraska area code (it's in Washington state, which I believe is within a thousand miles of Nebraska, though I have never been to either one). Darling 206, what were you doing in Nebraska? What does anyone do in Nebraska? I don't mean to be bratty and East Coast snobbish here, I am asking innocently: What is there to do for fun in Nebraska? Should I vacation there? Do I have any Nebraska readers to help me out here?

did u get the message i forward to u
from a 609 phone number, Friday, April 10, 12:04 PM

hey buddy whatz up
from a 609 phone number, Friday, April 10, 3:24 PM

hey u going skating tonight
from a 609 phone number, Friday, April 10, 6:46 PM

hey u going skating tonight let me know
from a 609 phone number, Friday, April 10, 7:03 PM

This kid again. Amara! We did not go skating in Saugus this weekend! FAILURE.

Were by the dress rooms says mom
Wilson
from a 989 phone number, Thursday, April 9, 12:52 PM

"Mom says we're by the dress rooms. I'm just taking her word for it. Personally, I look around our location in this store, and I have absolutely no way of telling if we're by the dress rooms or not. Because I am not a woman."

Hey i dont know if i can go tomorrow but ill know if i can go after school so can you wait til then for an answer?
from a 774 phone number, Wednesday, April 8, 9:31 PM

I don't know if I can wait. Maybe. Go where?

Car on 6th @ 15th
from a 201 phone number, Wednesday, April 8, 11:06 AM

Could be a text occurring right down the road from me. I live very close to the intersection of 6th and 15th. Of course, could also be a text occurring in any U.S. city with gridded streets. The only way to tell would have been for me to race down to the corner of 6th and 15th to see if there was a car there or not. But I am sorry to say that I fell down on that job.

hey
Oz3baA $#3r1Ff
from a 703 phone number, Tuesday, April 7, 3:54 PM

This sig line has gotten a lot more complicated in the past few months.

Pls hurry after school. HAVE TO PIK UP SISTERS. XO
from a 952 phone number, Tuesday, April 7, 9:23 AM

Do we think this is from Leila's mother? I feel like your mom shouldn't be allowed to text you while you're at school. It sounds like it would really cut into your independence, which is limited enough when you're 10 years old.

415 n bedford
from a 310 phone number, Monday, April 6, 6:13 PM

Could be anywhere. Doesn't every city have a Bedford St? New York alone has at least two.

Do me
from a 443 phone number, Sunday, April 5, 6:36 PM

ahahahaha probs my favorite text of the week. I'm mature like that.

Dont Call Moms phone Cause i have it
from a 313 phone number, Saturday, April 4, 10:06 PM

Just from all the capitalized words here, I had hoped this would be some take-off on Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, a film that includes one of my all-time favorite lines ("What is it, Carolyn? Something?"). But, um, it was not.

hey bad news i cant go to your game because i am going to go and hang with nick west so text back
from a 609 phone number, Saturday, April 4, 11:30 AM

So, usually, 609, when blowing off a friend, you're supposed to tell them you "feel sick" or "have a lot of homework" or "a family thing," even if you're really just going to hang with Nick West. Your friends don't exactly like to hear that they mean less to you than Nick West, you know? This can be a lesson to all of us, if we interpret "hanging with Nick West" to be a metaphor.

I know this is short notice, but bring ur bathing suite, and a towel to my party.
From rachael
from an 805 phone number, Friday, April 3, 10:13 AM

hey sorry for this being kinda last minute but tomorrow night at like 8 im having a little get together and we would watch a movie then go in the jacuzzi
from a 408 phone number, Saturday, April 4, 1:35 AM

How popular Leilas were this weekend! I hope all my fellow Leilas have a number of bathing suits they were excited to wear this past weekend.