Hey! I just got a job offer.can you do pro's & cons wme over brunch
from a 909 phone number, Monday, August 13, 1:49 PM

This one I actually called back. I rarely call the Leila Texters, because there are a lot of them and it's always awkward to explain. The conversation, when I do bother to call, generally goes as follows:

THEM: "Hello? Who is this>?"
ME: "Hi, sorry to bother you, but you just texted me."
THEM: "Um, no, sorry. You must have the wrong number."
ME: "Were you trying to text your friend Leila?"
THEM: (obviously creeped out) "Yes..."
ME: "Right, your text came to me by accident. You see, there's this weird thing with Verizon..."

That was pretty much what this particular phone call went like, except one-sided, because I got the girl's voicemail. I left her a message that ended lamely with, "Congratulations on your job offer! Sorry, that was weird, never mind."

My co-worker Leslie suggested that I should have offered to do pros and cons with her. It was a good idea; I am excellent at pros and cons.